🌱 Flamme research · State of Couples 2026
do couples talk less the longer they're together?
Couples together less than six months write about 12% more per answer than couples together four years or longer (11.5 words vs 10.3).
Word counts come from a random sample of 250,000 answers. Relationship length is what users chose to share at sign-up. Data: 2,722,793 answers, 2 February 2023 to 14 October 2026. How we did this.
by An Nayal, founder of Flamme · Updated
the numbers
| group | chart | words per answer |
|---|---|---|
| under 6 months | 11.5 | |
| 4+ years | 10.3 |
- The share of long answers (past 25 words) drops from 11.8% for the newest couples to 9.7% for couples together 4+ years.
- 35% of people who shared how long they had been together are under six months in, and 27% are at four years or more.
what does it mean for couples?
The gap is real but small: about one word per answer. Long-term couples still write, they just say less to cover the same ground, partly because they already know a lot of the answers.
If you have been together for years, questions you do not know the answer to are the ones that bring the words back. Deep and reflective questions get the longest answers of all.
cite this
Free to quote with a link. For other cuts of the data, email hello@flamme.app.
Flamme, "The State of Couples 2026: Newer Couples Say More", flamme.app/state-of-couples/newer-couples-write-more, published 30 October 2026. Based on 2,722,793 answers by 88,622 people, 2 February 2023 to 14 October 2026.
how was this measured?
Flamme is a couples app where both partners answer the same daily question and then see each other's answer. We analysed 2,722,793 answers to 1,919 questions from 88,622 people, written between 2 February 2023 to 14 October 2026. Word counts come from a random sample of 250,000 answers. Relationship length is what users chose to share at sign-up. Everything is a count or an average. Flamme users chose a couples app, so they are not a random sample of all couples, and most answers are in English. Full method and limits on the State of Couples 2026 report.
good questions, answered
A little, in Flamme's data. Couples together under six months write about 12% more per answer than couples together four years or longer (11.5 words vs 10.3).
An Nayal
Founder of Flamme, the couples app used by more than 200,000 partners. He writes the relationship guides here and builds the free tools that go with them. annayal.com
