Couples Quiz · free · ~3 minutes
is this my soulmate? 💞
Ten honest questions about the bond you two have right now. Not a destiny test: a look at the things that make love feel meant to be, and that you can both keep building.
by An Nayal, founder of Flamme · Updated
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When you tell your partner something you're embarrassed about, they usually...
what does psychology say about soulmates?
Psychologist Raymond Knee separated two beliefs about love. Destiny belief says a relationship is either meant to be or it is not. Growth belief says relationships are built and problems can be worked through. In his research, people high in destiny belief were more likely to disengage after a negative event, and people high in growth belief were more likely to try to fix things (Knee, 1998).
How you talk about love matters too. In a 2014 study, people who had a "made for each other" frame in mind felt less satisfied with their relationship after recalling a conflict. People thinking of love as a journey did not (Lee & Schwarz, 2014; University of Toronto summary).
So this quiz does not ask whether the universe picked your partner. It asks about the things a soulmate bond is made of, the ones you can see and change. For the longer read, see our guide to soulmate signs and what psychology actually says, and the Gottman Institute's take on how to know if your partner is your soulmate.
💞 Soulmate material: a bond you're both building
You feel safe, known and on the same team, and you still have fun. That is what people usually mean when they say "soulmate", and you two are doing it.
🏡 Strong foundations, a few rooms to finish
Most of what matters is there. One or two areas are quieter than the rest, and those are the ones worth a little attention.
🌗 Real feelings, some open questions
There is something here, and there are parts of the relationship that do not feel solid yet. That is worth being honest about, with yourself first.
🧭 Worth a hard, honest look
Your answers suggest you often don't feel safe, known or supported. Whatever you call this person, you deserve a relationship where those things are true.
what should we do after the quiz?
🔥 find your lover type
Type of Lovers sorts you into one of 16 lover types and shows how yours pairs with your partner's. Free, at typeoflovers.com.
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💞 do the couple version in Flamme
One question a day that you both answer, then see each other's answer. It is the daily version of everything this quiz asks about.
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good questions, answered
Psychology does not have a test for a destined match. What it can point to are the signs of a bond that lasts: you feel safe with them, they know your current hopes and worries, you act as a team, you both keep growing, and you still have fun. This quiz asks about those.
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Type of Lovers sorts you into one of 16 lover types and shows how yours pairs.
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❤️🔥 ask the love coach
got your result - now what?
Flamme AI is a free relationship coach. Ask what your result means for you two.
- I got my result - what should I actually do with it?
- how do I explain this to my partner?
- we scored differently - is that bad?
